We
know you've got it tough. People just don't understand you. Mom took away
your new Rob Zombie CD and Dad shut down your Ed Gein web site. Your math
teacher made you remove your "I Love John Wayne Gacy" T-shirt and the
principal suspended you for your art montage featuring the skulls of dead
squirrels. But, we all know you'll have the last laugh... some day!
Until then, look at all the killer stuff you can
score at Unkle Sleezy's Serial Killer-Torium!. If you love murderabilia
(and we know you do) you're dying to get you hands on these personal artifacts
of society's most notorious mass murderers. These items will allow you
to revel in each sicko's glory to the fullest, including...
Jeffrey Dahmer's Nose Hair Clippers!
These babies pretty much define the essence of "cool." When our boy Jeff
wasn't chopping off genitalia or having sex with severed heads, he was
keeping his appearance trim and neat. Keep the stray nose vines at bay
for only $1500.
John Wayne Gacy's Acne Cream!
Hey, all that clown paint takes its toll on a fellah's skin. John made
sure his skin was as soft as a baby's bottom (and he would know) with
this gallon sized tub of nonprescription acne medication. We're pleased
to pass this on to you for $2500.
Ted Bundy Dental Floss
Ted knew that the quickest way to woman's heart was making sure you didn't
have any spinach between your teeth. (Well, actually, Ted once said that
the quickest way to a woman's heart is by carving it out of her chest
with a dinner knife, but you get the picture.) Comes in two packages:
Minted 1000$ and Non-Minted $1500.
Ed Gein's Ear Wax
For years Gein would empty out his ear canal with a Q-Tip and collect
the contents in plastic jars. Now you can have a piece of this national
treasure all for yourself. (That'll shut up the next guy who tries and
show off his chunk of the Berlin Wall.) - $2000 per tablespoon.
David Berkowitz's Toilet Bowl Cleaner
This is a ONE OF A KIND item removed from the infamous Son of Sam's apartment
by Unkle Sleezy himself. Make sure you don't miss out on this unique opportunity
and BUY IN BULK!!! $3000 per bottle! (Limit: 10 per customer.)
There
you go kids. You'll be the envy of the neighborhood when you show off
these goodies. Order the entire package for only $10,000, it's money well
spent!